Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Know a bad senior driver?

Well, there is a new program available, Independent Transportation Network, "which provides on-call rides to seniors who trade in their cars and give up their keys in return. Maine resident Katherine Freund created the ITN after her 3-year-old son Ryan was run over by an 84-year-old man who kept going after he struck the child. He later said he thought he'd hit a dog."

Now there are some good elderly drivers out there, but there are also some who make the roads dangerous and need this program. Now if someone would start a program for teenagers, our roads would be a LOT safer.

Summertime... time to fix your home

Plannin on selling your home soon? Here are ten ways to increase the value of your home, cheaply!

1. Make your kitchen really cook.
2. Give appliances a facelift.
3. Buff up the bath.
4. Step up your storage.
5. Add a room in a week or less.
6. Mind the mechanics.
7. Look underfoot.
8. Let there be light.
9. Reframe your entry.
10. Consider curb appeal.

Click the above link for more details

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Eat out, in your home

Here's a wesite that has recipes for your favorite restaurant foods. Enjoy!


Friday, May 05, 2006

Hurray for higher speed limits!

Midkiff between Kimberlea all the way south is now 40 MPH, instead of 35. Everyone still goes 50 down that road anyway though...

Wadley, between Midkiff and Midland Drive, is now 45 MPH, instead of 40. Now if they can only make the school zone 30 - I never see anyone from that school walking home...

And they need to fix the timing on the lights on Midland Drive. They are timed at night time to where you have to stop for each one, and wait through the turning light even if no one is around. I know most of them don't have those big sensors on the lightposts, but I thought they had ground sensors. I mean come on... they used to work jut fine... Why mess with 'em?

Thursday, May 04, 2006

I'm sure 90% of you have already read this...

(From another circulating e-mail, author unknown)

1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while
healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.


Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?


On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after
(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on
(but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or
operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and... I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use
(as opposed to...what?)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your
hands or genitals."
(..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to repost this message for others to read